Harley's Hill

Scout’s putting a fucking thing on his neck. –Chris

That should be the official description. –Rosalie

Oh, I didn’t see her there. It’s a good thing we weren’t talking about her, huh? -Chris

Does anyone have coffee? -Ariel

Real coffee? No. Fake coffee? No, but I can run down to the crafty . . . tent and get some. –Shiloh

Tell her we’re ready to knock ‘em out. And then we’ll run lines, after we knock them out. –Chris

Oh my. I have a rug. I have a rug that breathes. –Valecia

I have the ability. I have the technology. And I’m just damn skinny. –Marco

Don’t go forward, you’ll run me over. –Chris

*Annee drives forward*

Oh! Son of a bitch! -Chris

Cellito? Marshmallow? Please don’t hate me. –Colleen

There’s nothing wrong with villains! They’re cool. I can relate. –Jax

You’re like, obsessed with my Munny. –Jax

What? -Paige

I ate shit right here earlier. –Jax

Fuck animal style. I just want my meat. –Paige

I’m exhausted, and I haven’t even done anything. –Hank

I had my gallbladder taken out. –Tony

And you’re back at work? -John

Well, they said I could go back to work after two days. It was laparoscopic. –Tony

Did they go through your penis? -John

TV without pictures. So much better. –Tony

There are just some things I’m obligated to scream. -Jax

Oh, don’t worry. I’m on crack. –Marcello

You are full of these today. –Ariel

We’re not gonna say what these are. –Valecia

I’m trying to find my button. –Shiloh

That sounds so dirty. –Paige

Paige, I would appreciate it if you would stop turning everything I say into an innuendo. –Shiloh

I can’t help it. Could you stop saying things that are so easy to turn into innuendos? -Paige

I can’t help it. They just pop out. –Shiloh

Well, if you’re gonna lay it out for me . . . –Paige

If you wanna be sticky and gooey, you can be. –Cari

We worked on a movie called ‘Dark and Stormy’ . . . You’re dark and dirty. –Paige

I wish I was sponsored by Red Bull. –Brad

Eating healthy there, Rick? -John

These are organic. –Rick

It’s about the horse and his hand. –John

We’re not your love babysitters. –Annee

I’ll be yours. –Chris

Dude, why didn’t Armageddon come? -Colleen

Get off my channel. –Colleen

Good week. –Ariel

Crazy week. But yes, good week. –Shiloh

The canteen. Snack shack. Whatever you want to call it. I would call it the Roach Coach, but that doesn’t quite fit cuz their food is really good. –Stan

And they’re all different, so there are four sides of Batman goodness. –Shiloh

Mornin’ Utah. How’s it goin’? -Alex

I will be Ninja Scripty! -Paige

Her neck just snapped back. –Paige

She’s a child. She’s a flexible. –Shiloh

Remember those days? -Paige

That’s an interesting bird. With the black and white rings around its neck. –Paige

It’s a poofinch. –Shiloh

Men are overrated. –Shiloh

Overrated, yes. But they perform functions I cannot do for myself. Like reaching the top shelf. –Paige

Someone cue the wind. –John

What’s our time? Realistic time, not Hollywood time. –Annee

I would like to eat those cows. But not one of those cows cuz I don’t like to know my meat. –Paige

Hey, you’re in charge now. Have fun. Make good decisions. –Ariel

They just happened to be giving away peanut butter with every bottle of Mountain Dew. –Stan

Here’s a key to my room. –Larry

Why, thank you. –Shiloh

I hear these things happen on movie sets. –Larry

I just needed a spoon. –Paige

He didn’t wanna come without his friends. –Chuck

I’ve planned my entire wedding. It’s insert groom here. –Paige

Everything is either for or over a woman. Or in spite of. –Brad

I did not know you could mix fruit with that activity. –Brad

The golf cart’s a-rockin. –Lauren

If the golf cart’s rockin, you can probably see what’s goin’ on. –Cari

Did you just call the pot black? -Lauren

Yeah, just a little bit. –Cari

He’s been very nice to you. If you kick him in the face, that makes you not a very nice person. –Matt

Everything was perfect, except somebody didn’t commit. –Matt

I’m gonna get on Cody. –Ricky

You’re gonna get on me? -Cody

It wouldn’t be the first time I got on Cody. –Ricky

When I get going I’m goooood. –Alex

Look at the size of the snake behind Cari! -John

I have a legit disorder. Nail dysplasia. –Lauren

Nail dysplasia. –Shiloh

It’s gonna be recognized very soon. –Lauren

Sorry guys, we’re having a technical difficulty. –Colleen

I told you not to call me that. –Matt

You look clean and nice to play with. –Paige

I like that color on you. –Paige

What color? -Chuck

Blush. –Paige, Cari, and Lauren

I look like a model out of focus and far away. Giselle, to be exact. –Marco

If I have to drag my gimpy ass down to base camp . . . –Colleen

If I do it perfect the first time and they make me do it again, they owe me $5. –Brailey

We don’t have the budget. –Kirstin

I need to get Guido and Alfredo baseball bats. –John

We’ll get the Hell’s Angels for our security. –John

You can be my agent. –Eric

You can be my agent. –John

I know you are not a walking Costco, but . . . –Brad

He’s trying to say he needs some water. –Cari

I’m a badass. I’ve got gloves on. –Colby

Oh no, look. It’s riding another one. –Kirstin

I don’t think Goldie’s a girl. –Lexi

His name’s Pigeon. Did you ever see anything less birdlike? -Lauren

You mean you don’t wanna do makeup on Elray? -Colleen

I would love to do makeup on Elray, but I don’t think I’m allowed. That’s not my union. –Shiloh

You’re gonna get me in trouble with the Humane Society. Go away. –Colleen

I don’t pay people to fix my stuff. -Ricky

Just be careful. You’re not a real cowboy. Just on the internets. –Rick

He used to be a buckin’ horse, and buckin’ horses always have strange names. –Lauren

You can’t make a G-rated movie with an X-rated body. –Chuck

It’s like Capri’s for my arms. –Chuck

You just can’t get on a horse, can you? -Lauren

No. –Chuck

I have rubbers. –Annee

You have rubbers? -Alex, Cody, Ricky

Shut up you guys. –Annee

I love collies in business mode. –Lauren

Can’t show that in a family film. –Chuck

Gidget is such a punk rocker right now. –Lauren

He’s not a horse, he’s a continent. –Lauren

I hear you got a little damp out on the range. –Cari

10 minutes of work, and 10 seconds to take down. –Cody

That’s my life babe. –Lauren

You all sound the same on the phone. You know . . . women. –Chuck

You just wanna see me bend over in wet pants, dontcha. -Chuck

I’ve got a pocketful of snot tissue. –Ariel

The best thing about drag ball this year was everyone admiring my costume. –Lynne

Mr. Potter has come to take back Harley and crush the hearts of babies everywhere. –Ariel

Are you even looking at me? -Elmo

Is drinking water normal? -Elmo

Of course it is. –Jax

It’s just as bad, and not as good. –Chuck

Watch it. I will send you out nekkid. –Valecia

What is that? -Valecia

A rat. –Chuck

Spartans! Clean the stables! -Eddy

Oh, that’s not a happy face. –Marcello

You gotta get the right size, or the man in the canoe gets a little irritated. –Annee

Better than my fake Texans last year. –Ariel

Wasn’t me. –Marcello

You think someone heard me? -Alex

Annee, your pants are on fire. –Paige

That’s cuz I’m hot shit. –Annee

I have one for you. *sees Kirstin* Maybe later. –Cari

Look out. There’s a screw box between your legs. –Cari

I don’t work at Crapplebee’s. –Lauren

Stop pulling my strings. –Eddy

I am so full. I had three plates of food today . . . –Eddy

Sounds like a personal problem. –Shiloh

Why don’t you eat your cookie. –Eddy

Are you taller than the other girl? -Eric

Hey Sarah. How’s Hansen? -Ricky

We took a weekender and made it girly. –Valecia

I’m just the red-headed bastard child. –Valecia

Brunette, actually. –Marcello

I’ve got a bunch of random things in there. It’s still my road trip stuff, so a lot of soundtracks. Sucker Punch, Jekyll and Hyde, Next to Normal, Dracula . . . Lion King. –Shiloh

Competitive hair clippiness. –Ariel

No macaroni and cheese for you! You have to fit into tight pants today. –Valecia

It’s an in-betweener. –Ariel

What are you saying about my wiener? -Chuck

Whatever I say, you girls are gonna giggle, aren’t you? -Chuck

I’m really sad those jeans don’t fit you. –Ariel

You mean the ones that grab my . . . that grab me really tight? -Chuck

You might just have to wear them then. –Lynne

Most women are picky about the wood they choose. –Chuck

I was talkin’ about blue balls earlier. –Chuck

No, that’s what you have cuz your jeans are too tight. –Ariel

This stuff smells like Alka-Seltzer. –Lauren

Well, don’t drink it. –Lynne

But I need to be fertilized. –Lauren

The real question is whether you want to be fertilized or do you want the act of fertilization? -Lynne

They’re getting poop on the frame. –Cari

There have been worse things on it. –Bryan

I left it here, which means it could have crossed into a trans-dimensional portal by now. –Shiloh

Wanna hold my tool? -Ariel

You’re soft. –John

Put the white shirt back on, white boy. –Ariel

Our trailer’s not as cool as your trunk. –Ariel

This is my Cuban. –Jax, about Eddy

Guys, nobody should bring their sharpie to the bathroom. –Ariel

Elvis almost bit me today. It was a love bite. –Valecia

You sound so happy about that. –Shiloh

I’m gonna have a blonde racing stripe! –Brailey

Toodley-oodley. –Shiloh

You sound like you should be on the Mickey Mouse Club. –Valecia

The medic has more different versions. –Ariel

This is not a movie. This is an emotion piece for young ladies. –John

Contrary to popular belief, this is not my first rodeo. –Paige

Is this also steadicam? -Paige

Yeah. What are you, asleep at the wheel here? -John

See what I removed from your kid’s movie? -Cari

Thanks. I appreciate it. –Paige

That was just a general yawn. –Cari

You should’ve seen her reaching into her bag for a hat. –John

I’m calling grace, guys. –Colleen

Oh, tell her I said hi. –Paige

I can make a chair. I’m just that good. –Chuck

Get a room you two. –Hank

But we’re right here. –Chuck

I work hard for the figure I try not to have. –Ariel

Marcello, your butt is like jello. –Kirstin

Stop talking about my gelatin a . . . butt. –Marcello

We have to take the kiss off because Oh. MY. God. –Marcello

Well, I could use my short legs, but I left them at home. –Chuck

Suck it in, Chuck. –Ariel

I’ve shot Murphy. Murphy’s Law is dead to me. –Brad

This cowboy only has one leg so he can stand on the horse. –Ariel

Oh. We though he was Chuck standing sideways. –Lauren

Did you see my twin? -Marcello

I slept with your twin. –Shiloh

Bitch! I thought I felt a little tickle. –Marcello

How do you solve a problem like Maria? -Marcello

When I used to be 105 lbs and a size 2 . . . yeah. –Paige

So was I. –Marcello

You wanna do him in his room? -Marcello

I’m gonna take this cupcake back to the trailer and do dirty things to it. –Marcello

I don’t want the gift. I have my own gift. –Ariel

Fuuuudgsicles and strawberry ice cream. –Shiloh

How’s it hangin’? -Lauren

It’s not. –Marcello

I’m good at giving them. –Ariel

That just proves how this thing misquotes people. But I’m good at giving those too. –Ariel

I do have his tool now. It’s small, but it goes both ways. –Lauren

I found it like the tooth fairy. -Lauren